Monday 31 January 2011

The Emergency Plumbing Con

The other weekend I made the mistake of looking at the drain from my kitchen. Eeeeeeuuuuugh! Of course I don't have a "rod" and of course I'm not experienced enough with blocked drains to be sure I could clear it even if I had. How does a regular householder get that kind of experience? I have learned from previous experience not to use Yellow Pages, so I called my insurance company, who told me I was insured if a tree root had come through the drain, but not if it was just blocked. Then I called the Gas Board because I had some vague idea I might be insured through them, but I wasn't, though they did put me through to Dyno-Rod. Who quoted me some numbers which were not utterly silly and came round two days later. Sure enough the young man shoved the rod firmly on the water, cleared the blockage and also vacuumed out my sink pipes - all within a half-hour. No time-wasting with bogus investigations and surveys, no head-shaking and muttering about using fancy equipment. It's not the cheapest thing I've ever done, but I've had worse experiences. My drains are now clear and there isn't a nasty whiff when the washing machine churns out water. Worth every penny, though I will buy a "rod".

What wasn't worth every penny was what I paid the last time my drains were blocked - the previous experience I just mentioned. That time the main drain was blocked as well. When the Yellow Pages plumber took the lid off there was water with all sorts of nasty things that come out of the back of people floating in it. I was then subjected to what I later learned was the usual time-wasting fee-generating twaddle. Three hours later, he had run up a large bill and cleared the drain, telling me that I could recover some of the cost from the other people who shared the same drain. We're talking £800 here. Yes, I know. It's what one of my neighbours said when I went round explaining what had happened. I stopped out of shame after that. But like the ad says: when you need a plumber, you need a plumber. The same neighbour explained how the con works: that they spend at least half-an-hour messing around pretending to investigate where the water is coming from, not going to, where the drain is and where it joins the street, all of which is useless in nearly all cases. Then they get the equipment out, push the gadget down the drain and leave it in neutral for an hour or so while the bill runs up. At some stage under the pretence of "checking" something, they will go back to the van, turn the gadget on and within minutes clear the blockage.

Having heard this, I contacted a firm of solicitors to see if I could get some or all of my money back. Sadly, no. The contract was what it was, and of course I could not prove they were putting on an act.There's no way round it, except: 1) by your own "rod" for simple drain clearing; 2) talk to Dyno-Rod first, as they didn't have call-out charges and didn't mess around; 3) when the emergency plumber asks you for the credit card imprint before he starts, write very clearly on the card form "Valid only up to (say) £100." The lawyer said that sticks. Call the credit card company and tell them that. Of course the plumber will bitch and moan and want to leave. At this point, I suspect the following might work: you show the guy £100 in used £20's and tell him that's for him if he sorts the problem. He can tell his boss about how you played the raw prawn and he had to go. If you've got the nerve to do that, it has a chance of working.

So it's not just you. It's me as well. And someone else at the place I was working at the time. If this hasn't happened to you, don't be smug. Wait till you get a house and have to deal with all this stuff you leave to the landlord.

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